Back To Science Class, Already!

Amidst the ongoing battle against “Intelligent Design” (talk about oxymorons) we have today’s sample of “(Un)Intelligent Meteorology”:

My Vote-casting and YouTube debut

Just so you know that I put my money where my mouth is … I posted my very first homebrew video to YouTube this week, a rambling demonstration of the use of a Washington State absentee ballot. Secret ballot, hell – what secret?

Not to say this is the best demonstration of the subject; in point of fact, it’s kinda lame. Probably due to being unscripted, not well-thought-out, done on the spur of the moment, produced on my laptop’s built-in webcam, and having been my very first crack at using Windows Movie Maker. (A decidedly lame and low-capability tool to begin with.) I must admit, the phrase that came to mind when I first watched the finished product was a quip from David Sedaris: “There’s a reason regular people don’t appear on TV: we’re boring.”

Still, what the heck? It was fun. It’s a start. It was a learning experience. And you all get to watch me sitting around Ulsan, being a good US citizen and Doing My Civic Duty, as a Participant in Our Democracy.

Enjoy:

SM 5, SP 0: F-f-f-f-fashion…

Oops.

No, seriously … take a close look at that scarf Miss Wasilla’s wearing. Never mind its ugliness …

Sphagnum Moss 4, Palin 0: Are You Smarter Than A 3rd-Grader?

My favorite comment on this one (and I wish I’d thought of it first) was from the ever-rampaging Keith Olbermann: “Are You Smarter Than A Third-Grader?”

Me, well, to dust off an old Faux slogan … we’ll report. You decide.

The question, from a real-life third-grader: “What DOES the Vice-President do?”

Aw, that’s something that Piper would ask me, as a second grader, also. That’s a great question, Brandon, and a Vice President has a really great job, because not only are they there to support the President’s agenda, they’re like a team member, the teammate to that President. But also, they’re in charge of the United States Senate, so if they want to they can really get in there with the Senators and make a lot of good policy changes that will make life better for Brandon and his family and his classroom. And it’s a great job and I look forward to having that job.

Now, being a teacher, who has known a lot of third-graders (many of them very bright, impudent, and loving nothing more than to play Stump-The Teacher) I’d like to think I’d have been bright enough to step around that big old beartrap. (On nationwide TV, no less.) And having once been a bright, smartassed third-grader myself (and an annoyingly overliterate one at that – just ask Mom) I can easily imagine the sparks crackling through that kid’s brain, as he sets the trap for yet another ignorant, patronizing adult floating around eight miles above her Peter Principle point … who can’t IMAGINE any third-grade kid actually KNOWING anything.

Even if it’s a basic fact of American civics that said smartass could dig up via an instant’s Googling of “U.S. Constitution.”

(I do so envy smart kids today … they don’t even have to walk all the way to the library anymore, let alone scrape off dust and barnacles from ancient two-ton encyclopedias. And then, if they’re particularly bright and/or vindictive, they can even YouTube the whole thing and rub salt in the wound. Has there ever been a better time in history to be a juvenile gadfly?)

The Ugly Truth, Courtesy Al-Jazeera.

Here, at a Palin rally in Ohio, is a clear reminder of exactly what decent Americans need to stand against. Also of why the US media are no longer to be trusted to tell us the whole story. It’s rather a shame that it took Al-Jazeera, of all folks, to get this story.

Watch and cringe … once was enough for me.

[via Crooks and Liars, Ta-Nehisi Coates, Spencer Ackerman]

John Cleese weighs in on the Funniest Palin.

Now this one was probably inevitable from the beginning, ever since some intrepid Monty Python fan put up the Michael Palin for President page. having sat back on the sidelines for a while, John Cleese has now chipped in his tuppence about our inimitable Miss Wasilla. I particularly like the fact that he has the grace to apologize to his colleague for no longer considering him the “funniest Palin”. Not to mention his point about parrots:

Naturally, we can all be forgiven for calling to mind a few of Cleese’s previously expressed thoughts on the subject.

Lightening the Wheelbarrow…

I’m also pleased to report that the Korean won has regained some ground from its horrific skid last week, though not enough to be out of the woods just yet.

Today it closed at 1240 per US dollar, although that was a slight fall after four straight days of gain following last Thursday’s low.

Better. But I’m not planning to make any wire transfers this month, regardless … the bailout news has set a relative calm over the tides for the time being, so I plan to wait until next payday (coincidentally, the day after Election Day in the US) and see what happens.

You never know – everyone might just come to their senses for a bit.

Sphagnum Moss 3, Palin 0 (Bonus Black-is-white point)

Okay, I know I’m a day or two behind on this, but it’s worth posting anyway … just because it’s so telling.

The “Troopergate” report finally came out, despite all attempts to stop it. The Alaska Legislative Council charged with the task (comprising mainly Republicans, by the way) voted unanimously to release it.

Finding Number One?

“For the reasons explained in section IV of the report, I find that Governor Sarah Palin abused her power by violating Alaska Statute 39.52.11(a) of the Alaska Executive Branch Ethics Act.

“The legislature reaffirms that each public officer holds office as a public trust, and any effort to benefit a personal or financial interest through official action is a violation of that trust.”

Miss Wasilla’s response, during a brief, phoned-in Q&A with the local press:

“Well, I’m very very pleased to be cleared of any legal wrongdoing … any hint of any kind of unethical activity there. Very pleased to be cleared of any of that.”

And there you have it. Black is white. We told you so, after all.

The much-admired and praiseworthy Mudflats has the story here, for those who want a lengthier and wittier angle on it with local color thrown in. Alaska politics can be pretty darn amusing on its own, but it’s even better when told from underneath the pile.

The Bluegrass Vote: Ralph Stanley Endorses Obama.

Boy, I can’t wait for the “Shut Up And Sing” crowd to react to this one …

We’re all used to the usual lineup of celebrity Democrat endorsements – actors, rock stars, the inevitable/insufferable Barbra Streisand. As well as the occasional token right-wing contrarian (Bruce Willis, Alice Cooper, Neil Young’s 1980 endorsement of Ronald Reagan) or outright wingnut (the insufferable/inexplicable Ted Nugent).

But when was the last time anybody heard from the bluegrass community?

Well, guess what, friends and neighbors: that criminally neglected demographic has raised its voice in Virginia. Ralph Stanley is out with this ad endorsing Barack Obama:

I don’t know about anyone else, but I’d say this thing is about over.

(And as crass and tasteless as it may seem, I can’t help picturing Ralph showing up at a McCain rally and launching into “Oh Death” … but Ralph’s too much of a class act for that.)

Buy A Wheelbarrow: Take two (They’re small!)

And the freefall continues … today the Korean won closed at 1395 to US$1, hitting a 10 -year low against the dollar.

According to the Korea Times, the won hasn’t been this weak since September 23, 1998. Which, some may recall, was the year after the Asian currency crisis when the won and many other Asian currencies cratered in value to the tune of 50% or more. Well, guess what, friends -  we’re well on our way there. That year is still referred to by Koreans as IMF, after the heavy emergency loans the country had to take from that agency in order to stay afloat. You can still meet a lot of elderly guys working as night-shift security guards who will tell you about their (mis)fortunes during that period. Hint: any story with the line “And then I worked for a trading company …” never has a happy ending.

Typically for Korea, the media “experts” explain the won’s sudden descent into Kleenex territory by blaming the foreigners:

Foreign investors selling stocks, coupled with the current account deficit, is pulling the value of the Korean currency, which has dropped 208 won against the greenback in four days. Foreigners have sold $33 billion in stocks so far this year, and the trade account is recording a $14.2 billion deficit. Concern over an economic slump is adding to a pessimistic outlook on the won. The rattled global financial markets, despite the bailout packages by the United States, is causing demand for liquidity in dollars ― considered a safety asset….

The foreign exchange market is panicking at even the slightest news, such as a North Korean missile test. North Korea-related news didn’t have much impact on the market during the former President Roh Moo-hyun administration.

Meanwhile, the current president, Lee Myung-bak, is wading into the fray to warn institutions against hoarding dollars.

And there you have it. Anything good happening in Korea means Koreans are the genius race of the world; anything bad is due to Korea being pushed around by big bad white people.

Call me crazy, but if every Korean person in history had been this dumb, Japan would still own their country (and their collective ass) to this day. Meanwhile, I get to watch my savings and investments get on an express bus to southern parts unknown. Go Greyhound. (retch)